Dreaming Of A White & Red Christmas Jumper

Amazon.com Price: £49.04 ($64.99) (as of 31/08/2026 15:11 PST- Details)

Read the Room rating

Office-safe

Wear it to work. Nobody will be taken aside.

How we rate jumpers

A wine-drinker's rewrite of the Bing Crosby line, at $64.99. One of the better-constructed jokes in this seller's range.

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Description

White or red — and not the snow.

This is a properly built pun: the song is universally known, the substitution is instant, and you do not need to have heard the joke before to get it. Most slogan jumpers fail on that last point. It also gives people at a party something to say to you, which is the practical function of a Christmas jumper and one that abstract patterns never perform.

Choose this if

  • You are the person who brings the wine, and everyone knows it
  • You want something that lands with an older crowd — the song reference does a lot of work with anyone over forty
  • You would rather have a joke that is about taste than about excess

The usual caution applies: it is a jumper about drinking. Fine at a dinner party, less clever at a work do, and not a good gift for someone who does not drink. Wine slogans read as more respectable than beer ones, but the subject is the same.

Printed crewneck, seller's flat $64.99, cold wash inside out. If you want the song without the alcohol, our history of White Christmas and the snow that never came is a better read than most product pages.

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