Bend Over and I'll Show You Christmas Jumper, Unisex

Amazon.com Price: £19.99 (as of 08/08/2026 20:01 PST- Details)

A crude double entendre on a plain crewneck. Funny among friends, and genuinely unwise anywhere near work.

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Description

No ambiguity about what this is, so the only useful thing to discuss is where it can go.

The slogan is a straightforward sexual double entendre dressed up as a Christmas line. The sweatshirt underneath is an ordinary unisex crewneck — the purchase is entirely the joke, and the joke is not a subtle one.

Where this can and cannot go

  • Fine: a pub, a house party, friends who expect it.
  • Not the work party. Attendance at a work event is effectively compulsory and the room includes people who cannot walk away from you. Explicit slogans are the most common cause of the January conversation nobody enjoys.
  • Absolutely not: anywhere with clients, children or a company photographer.

The structural problem with any slogan jumper is permanence. You cannot soften it after arriving, it appears in every group photograph, and someone will always be standing behind you reading it while you talk to someone else.

When the Christmas jumper goes too far is worth reading before this goes anywhere near an office.

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