Ugly Christmas Jumpers is a specialist site about one very specific garment: the deliberately terrible Christmas jumper. We find them, catalogue them, and write about how, where and why to wear them.
What this site is
Two things, really.
The first is a curated catalogue. There are a great many Christmas jumpers for sale online and most of them are indistinguishable. We pick out the ones that are actually interesting — the well-made knits, the genuinely funny slogans, the light-up designs that work, the film references worth the money — and organise them so you can find the right one for the occasion you have in mind.
The second is a set of guides. Choosing a Christmas jumper sounds trivial and mostly is, but there are real decisions in it: knit or print, lights or no lights, how sizing works, what lands in a mixed office and what gets you a conversation in January. We have written all of that down, along with a proper history of the garment, because it turns out to be a genuinely good story.
How we make money
We are an Amazon affiliate. We do not sell or ship anything ourselves — every product here is bought on Amazon, and if you buy after following one of our links, Amazon pays us a commission out of its own margin. It costs you nothing extra.
We would rather say that plainly on a page you can find than bury it in the footer. Our affiliate disclosure sets out the detail.
How we choose what to feature
Commission rates across clothing are broadly the same, so there is no financial reason for us to push one jumper over another. We list things because they are good examples of their type.
We should be straight about the limits of that. We have not physically handled every jumper on this site. Our product information comes from manufacturer specifications and listing details, and our recommendations are informed by that plus a reasonable amount of accumulated knowledge about what works at a Christmas party. Where we give practical advice — that acrylic knit is unbearable in a heated office, that all-over prints run small, that light-up jumpers arrive with half-dead batteries — that is general guidance about categories of garment, not a hands-on review of one specific product.
If you think we have described something inaccurately, tell us and we will correct it.
About the stories
Some of our articles are collections of office Christmas party stories. Those are fictional, written for entertainment, and labelled as such at the top of each piece. Nobody’s actual colleague got trapped in a two-person jumper during a fire drill, as far as we know. The practical advice attached to them is real.
Prices and availability
Any price on this site was correct when it was last pulled from Amazon and may since have changed. Amazon prices move constantly, particularly in December. The price on the Amazon page at the moment you buy is the one that applies. Items also sell out — Christmas jumpers are a seasonal product with finite stock, and the good ones go.
Get in touch
Corrections, broken links, suggestions for jumpers we have missed, or complaints about our taste — all welcome. See the contact page.